You punctuate every sentence with, "You know" at least twice.
You want mustard on your "hoagie".
You hate the Dallas Cowboys.
You realize that your favorite dessert is "Italian wooder ice".
You find yourself using "yo" and "youse guys" when talking long-distance to family members.
You refer to the "Schuykill Expressway" as "The Sure Kill".
You pronounce ACME "ACK-A-ME".
You think that $2,500 a year for car insurance on a 1977 Toyota Corolla is a bargain.
You find youself at a 4 star restaurant thinking "I wonder if they have cheese steaks?"
You sleep soundly through gunfire and ambulance sirens.
You caution others about "bike jackings" in Fairmount Park.
You visit New York and are impressed by its cleanliness.
You call sprinkles on top of your ice cream cone "jimmies".
You believe that "Pop" is an imitation for soda.
You relive the Phillies collapse of the sixties.
You always wondered how difficult it is to slash your wrist while pushing a car.
You relive the Phillies collapse of the eighties.
You still have not gotten over the "Ferguson Jenkins" trade.
You still have not gotten over the "Ryne Sandberg" trade.
You relive Wilt hitting the guide wire on an inbound pass against Boston.
You relive the "fog bowl".
You still have not gotten over the "Sonny Jurgenson" trade.
You still have not gotten over the "Charles Barkley" trade.
You believe that "Concrete Charlie" is the greatest middle linebacker of all time.
You believe that Mike Schmidt is the greatest third baseman of all time.
You don't think Wawa sounds funny.
You always pick Dr. J. in "Larry Bird vs. Dr. J." video game.
You watch "Rocky 2" once a month.
You'll never forgive Dick Clark for leaving Philadelphia.
You snub a cheese steak that isn't on an Amoroso roll.
Your parents, aunts and uncles all live on the same block.
"NOEL, NOEL" means the train is late.
You can't imagine a lunch break without a Tastycake.
You believe a sub is an imitation HOAGIE.
A vacation at the Jersey shore (pronounced "Down the shoore")
is better than
going to an island (there's more stuff to do, plus you know everybody.)
You believe that the spped limit on the Atlantic City Expressway is 90mph.
You still refer to drivers who do less than the speed limit in the passing lane as "Jersey drivers".
You catch yourself humming "Wildwood Days" in the summer.
You catch yourself humming "O them golden slippers" in the winter with your arms extended.
You have the "fire hydrant wrench" hidden in your basement.
You know where to find the "Eagle" in Wanamakers.
Center City is "downtown".
You still believe that the legality of fixing traffic tickets is in the Philadelphia city charter.
You know that only tourists go to Geno's, Pat's and Jim's for authentic cheese steaks before 2 A.M..
You were a regular attender at the 3 A.M Mass at St. John's on Sunday morning.
The only time you have seen the Liberty Bell, was on a class trip in third grade.
You will buy a pretzel from a street vendor without even thinking of where
it was - or where his hands have been.
You can't imagine eating a soft pretzel without hot mustard.
You love the sixers before they had A.I.
You know what a "Gola Goal" is.
You know what a "ring tail howitzer" is.
Kobie Bryant is not on your "All Time Philadelphia High School Baskeball Team".
You have the pizza place on speed dial.
Smokey Joe's is on speed dial and labeled "Smokes".
You believe that throwing snowballs at Santa is a Philadelphia tradition..
You don't get W.C.Fields humor about first prize being a "One week stay in Philadelphia" and " second prize being Two".
Every election you pencil in Steve Carlton for Mayor.
You refer to "tax accountants" as "Philadelphia Lawyers".
You believe that that being an "All Catholic Philadelphia high school sports selection" does entitle one to sainthood.
Whenever you see John Wooden on TV you yell "freeze it!"
You are irritated by the saying, "How are you fixed for blades!"
You marvel that in other cities "tennis courts" are not used for "street hockey" .
Your the only one at work who has played sandlot baseball on a concrete school yard.
Your the only one at work who has played sandlot football on a concrete school yard.
You can not imagine that co-workers have never played buck-buck when they were kids.
You still eye wooden brooms for their potential stick ball use.
You still eye tennis balls for their potential stick ball use.
You wonder what stick ball would have been like with metal broom handles.
You actually get some of this and pass them on to other friends from Philadelphia.